Why did you have to take the person I love

Why God? That’s the first question most of us ask when someone passes away. Why did you have to take the person I loved? Why did they have to die this way? Why couldn’t I have more years with them? So many questions and yet we still don’t know the answer of why did you have to take my loved one?

Why did you have to take my loved one?

Grief is a hard conversation that no one wants to have yet we all have to go through it. Most of us have lost someone that we loved and if you haven’t it’s coming.  Although I am a Christian and I believe in God and I believe he sent his son to die for us…I still ask why. Why do you take some of the best people?

When my mother died the first thing I did was ask God why. Why did you take my mother when
there are mothers out there who are full of bullshit. They don’t take care of their kids, they don’t
even like their kids. Some of these mothers abandon the kids or take money and don’t really
nurture their kids. Some mothers half raise their children allowing predators to come into the
home, not doing the right thing by their kids, etc. Why couldn’t you take some of the bad moms
and leave the good ones down here?

My mom was awesome! She was that strict mother who didn’t spoil me but made sure she sacrificed a lot to make sure that I had what I need. I would always ask my mother why we had to sleep in a twin size bed. We had a roof over our head and food but I didn’t have my own bed. My mom would simply say I can’t afford it but yet she sent me to private school. Later on, I realized that she was taking her hard earned money to pay for my education instead of buying a bed. My mother had just had surgery for her cancer two days before my graduation from high school. On the morning of my graduation, she came wheelchair and all against doctors orders and was there.

So I questioned God why did he take my mom. I sulked about it for years which lead to my depression because I was mad. I never got an answer by the way but I was able to understand that God only takes the best. At least that’s what I told myself.

I didn’t ask many questions when it came to the hubs

I think in some way I finally truly understand that we are only passing through this life. We are not here to stay and people will come and go. We have friends that come in for a season and leave. We have significant others
that are there for a few years and then we dump them or they dump us. Teachers have kids that
touch their lives and some that they don’t even remember after a year. When God took the hubs
I didn’t question as much…I still asked why because I didn’t think it was fair that my kids now
have to grow up without a dad but the thought that came into my head was that God is there
Dad..he just sent the earthly one for the time being. My hubs was able to be there for all of their
births and he was home every single day with his children. My kids got to see what a good dad
was and for that, I am grateful because my kids could have been like me….a child who never
knew their father or had that bond with a good man in my life. So I take his death and I turn it
into gratefulness because many don’t know what it is to have a father or even a good husband
who provided.

The lesson is to try not to ask God why. Easier said than done right? Trust me I know…. Accept that this was for your
good. I tell my kids that God needed a good postman (the hubs worked for the United States
Postal Service) to deliver some things for him and he had to find the best man for the job and
my hubs was the best. He does everything so calculated and for a reason. It may not look like it while you are in your grieving season that what he did was good but I promise you (I’ve been through this enough so trust me) when you look back on it you will see exactly why God did what he did. Also, instead of asking why try asking WHAT NOW?

How do you handle the question of why? Do you blame God sometimes for taking someone you love?