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I HATE cancer!

October 31, 2016

I don’t hate many things because hate consumes you but I do however hate one thing……..Cancer! It sucks and it pisses me off that we don’t have a cure (or do we?) Cancer  took my mother she had a rare cancer called Sarcoma.

A sarcoma is a rare kind of cancer. Sarcomas are different from the much more common carcinomas because they happen in a different kind of tissue. Sarcomas grow in connective tissue — cells that connect or support other kinds of tissue in your body. These tumors are most common in the bones, muscles, tendons, cartilage, nerves, fat, and blood vessels of your arms and legs, but they can happen anywhere.

Although there are more than 50 types of sarcoma, they can be grouped into two main kinds: soft tissue sarcoma and bone sarcoma, or osteosarcoma. About 12,000 cases of soft tissue sarcoma and 3,000 cases of bone sarcomas were seen in the U.S. in 2014.

Sarcomas can be treated, often by having surgery to remove the tumor.

My mother first had the tumor treated and moved when I was in middle school, it turned cancerous and she went to chemo. They cleared it and she was fine until it came back again during my senior year of high school. She had surgery two days before my Graduation….did she miss it nope. She told them doctors to wheel her in or she would do it herself because she wasn’t going to miss my graduation. She was there wheelchair and all. My moms best friend was a nurse so she made sure my mom was okay to make it through and she did. They cured her but I knew if she got it again that would be it. She did get it again a few years later after I had my first child. It came back and this time it was aggressive! We went to 3 different doctors to get opinions but there was nothing they could do. She died about 8 months after the diagnosis on December 19, 2007.

This month is Breast Cancer month but I go hard for all cancers. It’s tough when we have to see loved ones die of cancer. I always ask….how does one get cancer because even if you eat right and live a healthy lifestyle you can still get cancer. Is it hereditary, is it in certain things we consume? My mom always said she thought it was her birth control pills that gave her cancer. She maintained that until the day she died. I have no idea if there was a link but I am curious to know what do you think causes cancer? My moms friend granddaughter who is 21 has breast cancer and so did her mom and so did her grandmother. She just had surgery the other day so she is recuperating as we speak. 21…………how do you have cancer at such a young age. The affects of it is what kills me. She can’t work, her nails are gone, her hair is gone, she is in pain often….I wouldn’t wish this shat on my worse enemy yet so many of us know a loved one who has been touched by cancer of some kind.

I remember when my mom was sick that there were some days she just didn’t feel like moving. Here are some tips on how to deal with loved ones when they have cancer

  • Call or ask to visit before you pop up– Most cancer patients don’t want you to see them down. My mom didn’t want anyone around. People from the church would come by and she would tell them to leave….through the door. If i was there I would tell them that today is not a good day. They were itching to see her so badly that I had to finally put a stop to it. Call and check before you come over
  • Listen – Sometimes we talk and talk because we don’t know what else to do or say. Don’t talk about your problems until you have walked int he shoes of someone who has had cancer. You think you have problems because you couldn’t pay your bill on time……try having to do chemo….
  • Everyone’s mind is different so take cues from the person – some people get cancer and keep it moving. They don’t stop for anything. Not everyone will be that bubbly take cues from the person. If they are out and about and doing things normally then be normal and go with the flow. If they are down and out respect that and give them space. Each person takes sickness and healing different. Respect that person and don’t be so quick to think it’s all about you.
  • Food might not be a good idea – People always wanted to bring my mom food but with certain cancers it’s best to stay away from that casserole my mom use to love. Nope….she can’t have it. I use to turn down all the good food when they brought it.

When you have a loved one with cancer. It’s best to just be there and ask what is needed. They are tired from chemo because it drains them mentally and physically so offer to keep their kids if they have small ones, offer to run some errands for them maybe pick up some groceries, go to their house (after you call) and watch a movie with them preferably something funny. Another great thing to do is to take photos of them. I was hired to take photos for a grandfather who was dying of cancer a year ago. I won’t share those pictures as they were private and only for the family but to have photos of that time together for your kids and grandkids was priceless. He died a few months after I took the photos but I will never forget the smile  in his eyes when he saw his grand babies and the time he got to spend with them. Death comes at a cost and I feel that we already have to die of car accidents and other things why do we have to die from cancer. Cancer needs to get cancer and die!

I HATE cancer!

  • Reply
    Stacie @ Divine Lifestyle
    October 31, 2016 at 3:19 pm

    Thank you so much for sharing this. It’s so hard to know what to do or say or what not to do or say when someone has such a terrible disease.

  • Reply
    October 31, 2016 at 5:17 pm

    So sorry for your loss. I hate cancer as well. It has affected way too many people, and many close to us. It stinks and I really wish they could find a cure—fast!

  • Reply
    Pam Wattenbarger
    October 31, 2016 at 7:59 pm

    My mom had cancer and it was really hard. It is a terrible disease.

  • Reply
    Toni | BoulderLocavore.com
    November 1, 2016 at 9:10 am

    So sorry for your loss. 🙁 This is a great post to raise awareness about what cancer patients really need and want. Thank you so much for sharing.

  • Reply
    Tonia @TheChattyMomma
    November 1, 2016 at 2:20 pm

    I’m so sorry to hear about your mom. Thank you for this good advice. We forget sometimes that what we think a person needs is exactly what they don’t want (or need). My grandfather just passed due to cancer on September 2nd.

  • Reply
    Ann Bacciaglia
    November 1, 2016 at 2:22 pm

    Cancer is a terrible disease. Almost everyone knows someone who has been effected by it. I think it is so important to raise awareness.

  • Reply
    Chrystal | Nevermore Lane
    November 1, 2016 at 3:37 pm

    I am not a fan of cancer either. I have watched so many friends and family battle it and quite a few of them did not make it. It can be quite heartbreaking.

  • Reply
    November 1, 2016 at 4:00 pm

    These are all excellent suggestions! My dad passed from cancer when I was 17, and I’ve had many family members pass since from it. My daughter will be going to college next year and wants to study biochemistry with the hopes of working in medicine and maybe having a hand in developing something that will lead to a cure. I pray that cancer will be wiped out some day. It really sucks!

  • Reply
    Melissa @ thestatenislandfamily
    November 1, 2016 at 4:23 pm

    May your mother’s memory forever be a blessing. And thank you for sharing such an honest and painful part of your life story. These tips are truly so necessary when dealing with this stuff. So much love beaming at you through the World Wide Web right now. I hope you can feel it.

    • Reply
      November 2, 2016 at 3:39 am

      Thank you so much for this. It helps when I write it out it gives me a better peace.

  • Reply
    Seattle Travel Blogger
    November 1, 2016 at 4:47 pm

    I couldn’t agree more with you.
    I wish they would truly find a cure for all types of cancer.
    I am sorry for your loss.

  • Reply
    Janell Poulette
    November 1, 2016 at 7:30 pm

    I also hate cancer, as it has taken too many of my family members. I am so sorry about your loss, and this is a great way to spread awareness!

  • Reply
    November 1, 2016 at 10:44 pm

    I’m so sorry that cancer took your mother 🙁 This is such an important topic. I know way too many people that have suffered and passed away due to cancer.

  • Reply
    Dawn McAlexander
    November 2, 2016 at 12:12 am

    Cancer killed my mother and my father-in-law. It also made my mother-in-law really sick. Don’t think that I don’t hate cancer. What an awful disease.

  • Reply
    Kelly Hutchinson
    November 2, 2016 at 12:23 am

    My mom had breast cancer, so I get where you are coming from. Cancer sucks hard. I am sorry about losing your mom.

  • Reply
    November 2, 2016 at 12:27 am

    this is a great post. I’ve lost people to cancer and I have been through cancer with someone super close to me. It is AWFUL and the point about food is so important, better to check first.

  • Reply
    Reesa Lewandowski
    November 2, 2016 at 1:17 am

    It scares me to think about how many people will get it or had it or have it.

  • Reply
    Veronica Solomon
    November 2, 2016 at 2:55 am

    I definitely HATE cancer too. My husband died of cancer 11 years ago

    • Reply
      November 2, 2016 at 3:40 am

      Oh no! I just lost my husband in January due to a freak accident. It’s tough. My prayers are with you!

  • Reply
    November 2, 2016 at 8:00 pm

    So sorry for your loss Kita 🙁

  • Reply
    Robin Rue
    November 3, 2016 at 2:38 pm

    I have never had a loved one with cancer so I am sorry for your loss. Glad that you can speak openly to others with advice.

  • Reply
    Sarah Bailey
    November 3, 2016 at 2:39 pm

    Thank you for sharing all the advice. Cancer is never something to take lightly and if you have a loved one with it taking their needs into consideration is always the compassionate thing to do.

  • Reply
    Joyce Brewer
    November 3, 2016 at 9:41 pm

    Cancer is a very random disease. Did you know Christopher Reeve’s (Superman) wife Dana died from lung cancer and she never smoked? Other women who are vegetarian and run marathons get breast cancer.
    I think some of it IS genetic.
    Other times it’s lifestyle. My Dad smokes for almost 60 years and developed lung cancer right before he died.

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