I don’t hate many things because hate consumes you but I do however hate one thing……..Cancer! It sucks and it pisses me off that we don’t have a cure (or do we?) Cancer took my mother she had a rare cancer called Sarcoma.
A sarcoma is a rare kind of cancer. Sarcomas are different from the much more common carcinomas because they happen in a different kind of tissue. Sarcomas grow in connective tissue — cells that connect or support other kinds of tissue in your body. These tumors are most common in the bones, muscles, tendons, cartilage, nerves, fat, and blood vessels of your arms and legs, but they can happen anywhere.
Although there are more than 50 types of sarcoma, they can be grouped into two main kinds: soft tissue sarcoma and bone sarcoma, or osteosarcoma. About 12,000 cases of soft tissue sarcoma and 3,000 cases of bone sarcomas were seen in the U.S. in 2014.
Sarcomas can be treated, often by having surgery to remove the tumor.
My mother first had the tumor treated and moved when I was in middle school, it turned cancerous and she went to chemo. They cleared it and she was fine until it came back again during my senior year of high school. She had surgery two days before my Graduation….did she miss it nope. She told them doctors to wheel her in or she would do it herself because she wasn’t going to miss my graduation. She was there wheelchair and all. My moms best friend was a nurse so she made sure my mom was okay to make it through and she did. They cured her but I knew if she got it again that would be it. She did get it again a few years later after I had my first child. It came back and this time it was aggressive! We went to 3 different doctors to get opinions but there was nothing they could do. She died about 8 months after the diagnosis on December 19, 2007.
This month is Breast Cancer month but I go hard for all cancers. It’s tough when we have to see loved ones die of cancer. I always ask….how does one get cancer because even if you eat right and live a healthy lifestyle you can still get cancer. Is it hereditary, is it in certain things we consume? My mom always said she thought it was her birth control pills that gave her cancer. She maintained that until the day she died. I have no idea if there was a link but I am curious to know what do you think causes cancer? My moms friend granddaughter who is 21 has breast cancer and so did her mom and so did her grandmother. She just had surgery the other day so she is recuperating as we speak. 21…………how do you have cancer at such a young age. The affects of it is what kills me. She can’t work, her nails are gone, her hair is gone, she is in pain often….I wouldn’t wish this shat on my worse enemy yet so many of us know a loved one who has been touched by cancer of some kind.
I remember when my mom was sick that there were some days she just didn’t feel like moving. Here are some tips on how to deal with loved ones when they have cancer
- Call or ask to visit before you pop up– Most cancer patients don’t want you to see them down. My mom didn’t want anyone around. People from the church would come by and she would tell them to leave….through the door. If i was there I would tell them that today is not a good day. They were itching to see her so badly that I had to finally put a stop to it. Call and check before you come over
- Listen – Sometimes we talk and talk because we don’t know what else to do or say. Don’t talk about your problems until you have walked int he shoes of someone who has had cancer. You think you have problems because you couldn’t pay your bill on time……try having to do chemo….
- Everyone’s mind is different so take cues from the person – some people get cancer and keep it moving. They don’t stop for anything. Not everyone will be that bubbly take cues from the person. If they are out and about and doing things normally then be normal and go with the flow. If they are down and out respect that and give them space. Each person takes sickness and healing different. Respect that person and don’t be so quick to think it’s all about you.
- Food might not be a good idea – People always wanted to bring my mom food but with certain cancers it’s best to stay away from that casserole my mom use to love. Nope….she can’t have it. I use to turn down all the good food when they brought it.
When you have a loved one with cancer. It’s best to just be there and ask what is needed. They are tired from chemo because it drains them mentally and physically so offer to keep their kids if they have small ones, offer to run some errands for them maybe pick up some groceries, go to their house (after you call) and watch a movie with them preferably something funny. Another great thing to do is to take photos of them. I was hired to take photos for a grandfather who was dying of cancer a year ago. I won’t share those pictures as they were private and only for the family but to have photos of that time together for your kids and grandkids was priceless. He died a few months after I took the photos but I will never forget the smile in his eyes when he saw his grand babies and the time he got to spend with them. Death comes at a cost and I feel that we already have to die of car accidents and other things why do we have to die from cancer. Cancer needs to get cancer and die!