Let’s talk about the mental health of people today. I was talking to a friend whose friend committed suicide a few months ago. No one saw it coming. The girl was happy talked about life and talked about the future but yet she committed suicide. That’s the biggest thing with mental health…no one sees it coming. I myself went through a period of a downward spiral when I lost my mom years ago. Everyone asked me to seek help but I came up with every excuse in the book before I finally went. Why don’t people seek mental help? Here are a few reasons………
The stigma of being called crazy. A lot of people don’t seek help because they think others will look at them like they are crazy. They don’t want to labeled as such. Who wants to be known as the crazy cousin or the crazy Aunt at the family gatherings. Who wants to be thought about as crazy. Most people think that those with mental issues are….I myself use to see people on the side of the road talking to themselves and thought look at that crazy person not thinking that the person may have had something tragic happen to them or that they were mentally insane or had the capacity of a child. A sane person will always call others who don’t act like them crazy so the word and the thought comes up a lot. I think we have to move away from that and educate ourselves on mental health. People aren’t really crazy without a reason!
Will getting help…really help me. So I am one that doesn’t believe in spending money on things that may or may not help. Going to seek therapy I imagine I go into a room and talk to someone about whats on my mind and they sit and write down notes and then say hmmmm every few minutes and then they say well what do you think you should do. I want YOU to tell me what to do…that’s why I’m here. Do I want to spend money on someone not helping me? Is that person going to change my life around or am I going to be wasting their time and mine.
I have my friends…they are my therapist. I heard this statement a lot or…some folks even say I talk to myself…I am my own therapist. Now don’t get me wrong I have a great group of friends who tell me things I don’t want to hear they aren’t always on my side which is good but then sometimes I feel like…well your situation isn’t all peaches and cream. You ever go to your friend about your deep issues and realize that they have some issues also…makes me think that we are all crazy in some form or fashion. Your friends are not therapists and they can only help you to a certain extent. I am a firm believer that if you don’t walk in my shoes you can’t really help me.
Lack of insurance. This is huge because it costs to go and get help. I am sure some states have free help for those who need it but how do you go about finding free help. I googled Free mental help in Atlanta and found a lot of resources so the help is out there.This has greatly affected our women and men to this day. This is a frequent problem in our communities, lack of education and treatments. Having no insurance at all then leads to misdiagnoses, which then results in suicides and domestic violence against a partner or family member. The statics are loud and clear; we just have shout even louder to let everyone know in our communities that it’s ok not to be ok. It’s ok to seek help, or tell a friend.
Mental issues can come about when you are depressed and have a feeling of loneliness or a feeling of not being worthy. You can also have it from childhood. Maybe something happened to you as a child that you still carry with you today. Maybe you are sick and have cancer and want to end your life early. Maybe you were born with problems that doctors or your parents didn’t see. Maybe you lost people in your life and you don’t want to get close to anyone…the latter part is me. When my mom died I didn’t seek help because growing up in an African American household we didn’t talk about our mental health. Our parents would say oh nothings wrong with you that God can’t fix. If we spoke about feeling depressed or having feelings of trying to kill ourselves our parents would tell us to pray or that they would pray for us. No one suggested to go and get help from an actual doctor that was unheard of. They would sweep it under the rug and then just call that person crazy. No…that person was either born with mental issues or it developed because something happened. I was taught that no one should be in my business and I should deal with my problems on my own. I never sought help because I was taught that if I needed help no doctor on earth could help me…I needed to seek God he would be the only one that would heal me. So when I was down and out a few years ago that’s what I did. I didn’t tell anyone my problems or why I was so down and out and I know people saw it. I mean how do you go from 120lbs to 230lbs in 6 months…mentally something is wrong. I prayed and I did seek help a few years later but sometimes I feel like I should have sought more help. Today I am doing much better and I see things differently and it’s because I didn’t go to a regular therapist I went to someone who spoke to me and who outlined things for me. Someone who gave me feedback about my problems. That helped me a lot.
The sad part is…most don’t seek help. They just ignore it and then when it gets to be to much they either suffer in silence or kill themselves. I want those that need help to seek it if you can’t trust anyone talk to someone not biased about your situation but please please please talk to someone. Killing yourself isn’t the answer and you leave more questions than ever. I think the main thing we have to do is speak up and don’t let what other say keep us from getting the help that we need.
Do you or someone you know have mental issues? How do you help them help themselves?