I don’t know about you but I wasn’t one of those kids who wanted to grow up and move out. Hell my mother had to practically put me out because I wasn’t about to leave. I didn’t want to pay bills and move out on my own. Why pay bills when I can go and come as I please at her house (that was paid for) and stack my money. I like to look at my money in the bank and I am cheap….I don’t buy nothing lol. Growing up is a trap though and it’s not all that it’s cracked up to be. Sometimes I wish my mother was here because I surely would crawl back home and eat good and let her handle these kids that I have. Growing up is hard but here are some facts for those that are in their early 20’s….I want you to know that it’s tough being an adult and it doesn’t get easier
- Nobody cares about your dream or what you want to do with your life – Sure they will ask and pretend to be interested but most people….most….only care about their dreams and their goals and will stop at nothing to achieve those goals. Sure you can talk about your dream but no one is going to go get it for you. You have to want it for yourself and you have to care enough to be on a lonely road as you try to reach it.
- The same friends that you have in high school…..you probably won’t want to talk to now – So I am not friends with anyone from high school….well one person but yeah….I am in a different place than what I was in high school and most didn’t bother to come with me. You will change friends often because at every step in your life people will change and some can’t go with you on your next journey. I use to get sad at this but it’s life and you don’t forget them you just move on and find new people for the new journey. Each chapter of your life holds different people and that’s okay.
- Most adults don’t do what they love – They are either scared, don’t have the money, or they truly don’t know what they want to do. I have seen so many people over the age of 40 who don’t know what their passion is and they don’t know how to achieve it. Most adults go to work and bring home the bacon and live the same life for 40 years and then they retire and then they enjoy their grandkids and that’s it.
- The apple doesn’t fall to far from the tree – So many of us hate our parents when we are in fact just like them. I know someone who hates her mother and I want to scream to her…..sweetie…you are your mother. The very thing you hate about her is the very thing you did a few years ago. Some people must have hit their head and forgotten. I can understand denial but my gawd. In the same breath many adults hate their parents…..okay so they might not like how you turned out or you may not like them because they are set in their ways….not your problem. They birthed you, gave you shelter and needs, and now you are on your own. Let it go!
- The older you get the less you worry about others – When I was in my 20s I use to worry about what others say. My mom would always ask…who are they because I would say they said this or they said that. Now that I am in my 30’s I don’t give a rats ass what people say about me. I am comfortable in my skin and if you don’t like me then that’s okay. If I want to wear sweats all day then I do. I no longer worry about impressing anyone. I look in the mirror and I love who I am sweats, no makeup, and scarf on my head. I love it!
- When they say you are a reflection of the 5 people you hang around…trust me it’s true – If you hang around people who fit into what you want to do in life you win. If you hang around with Tamika who has 5 baby daddies, Kaci who has a 8 bucks an hour job, or Brittany whose lazy and doesn’t wanna work you will become them if you don’t get out. Luckily you can…you need to hang with those that are going somewhere. Some people won’t change and that’s okay you don’t have to stay with them.
- People will be jealous or envious of you – It happens….everyone goes through this. Some people take it to the next level some people are jealous for a moment and then get up and move. I don’t know a single person who hasn’t had some type of jealously or envious thought about something. I admit I look at others and wish I could be them and then I get to work on trying to be me harder. It motivates me to be better and to try different things to get there. Some people stay in their jealously and let it consume them.
- Always give from the heart – It makes you feel good and when you do things from the heart it always comes back to you.
- People don’t listen – As you grow up try to listen to others instead of overtalking them. When I was in my 20’s I did a lot of talking and not enough listening…….now that I am older I do way more listening because it helps. If you listen more you learn more
- Always be you – No matter how old you get or what life changes may happen always be you. If you lose sight of yourself then things go downhill.
I lost site of myself in my marriage it’s one of the things I regret! I became a mother and forgot I was a wife or Kita first. I didn’t put anyone before my kids not even me and I regret that. Lesson learned and I will never ever neglect me because if my cup is empty I can’t be anything for anyone else. What lessons have you learned so far about being an adult?