I am not a neighborly person. Back in the day it was nice to know your neighbor…sit on their porch and talk about things while sipping on iced tea. Today though……it’s a hi and a bye for me. I think mainly because I don’t want to have any bad blood against anyone especially those that live in my neighborhood. I gotta see these people and if I cuss them out….I still gotta see these people. I don’t know about you but when I cuss someone out I do not want to see them again…at all. Neighbors come in all different varieties so let’s discuss a few

The Nosy Neighbor – Let’s go ahead and start with the neighborhood snitch. This person knows everything from the car you drive to the packages you bring in. They peep your every move. The nosy neighbor is the one that talks to you the most. You don’t know much about them besides the fact that they are nosy. Isn’t it funny that the nosy neighbor knows all of your business but you know nothing about them. I had a neighbor in my last subdivision who was nosy…..she knew everything but I didn’t even know her name, nor what car she drove…..did she even drive? It was funny because when the hubs died she put a card in my mailbox with my name on it and I am like how does she know my name. My name wasn’t on the news or anything……I am still trying to figure out to this day how she knew my name and it puzzles me.

The neighbor who borrows stuff – There was a neighbor who borrowed our lawnmower…our weed eater……our flashlight (for what I don’t know their light was on) our shovel…..wait…were they trying to hide something…hmmmmm. Anywhoo, you have the neighbor who never buys their own shat but they borrow your shat. They drive mercedes benz and stays having a party but they can’t buy a gotdamn lawnmower. I am confused by this………my hubs was the nice one because I would have been like look…buy your own stuff. God blesses the child that has their own. This neighbor will borrow your socks if you let them. I hate people who borrow all the time like y’all went half on something and they think they have the right to ask for your things.

The party neighbor – my subdivision is pretty quiet but there is one lady a few doors down who has a get together it seems like every single weekend. It’s normally about 20 or so cars parked all up and down our streets every weekend either on a Friday or a Sunday. Now I don’t know if she has a lot of grandkids or kids or what but I am not a fan of coming out of my house and seeing cars lined up on the street every weekend. Things were so bad one day that they were parked by my house…and I live about 5 houses down. Like really though….what if I was having a get together you mean to tell me my people would have nowhere to park because you took up all the space. The party neighbor also doesn’t know when to shut the party down. It’s 1pm on a Sunday night…..really my kids do have to go to school I don’t want to hear the loud talking and stuff at 1am

The neighbor with the kids – Last night our neighbor from across the street came over to play with my son. He’s 9 and his mom I assume just let’s him roam free. So I let my son go over there and play and next thing I know the two of them are coming in my house. Did my son ask me if this stranger can come in here? Did the boy ask his mom? I am not a fan of kids just showing up in my house without permission and I don’t even know his name. Obviously his mom didn’t mind because he was over here for a good hour before I sent him on back home. Where was the mom? Who knows but for him to stay over here an hr after dusk dark and no one was looking for him…I thought that was strange. I don’t let my kids go nowhere without asking me first. Kids just come and knock on your door to play like I don’t run a tight ship around here. My child has school and a bedtime plus chores that he needs to complete before bed. Boy bye!

The neighbor with the ugly house and run down cars – This probably only happens in the neighborhoods that don’t have an HOA. I hate HOA but I also love that I don’t have to deal with run down houses. In my old neighborhood I did. I took a drive through there the other day and my gawd it looked so bad over there I was like did I really live over here. It was so unkept and not nice at all. I felt ashamed and I didn’t even live there anymore. My old house….the one we sold….was the worse in the neighborhood too! The grass wasn’t cut, the house needed to be bathed….it was ridiculous. The house next door was filled with cars some looked like it hadn’t been cranked in quite some time.

The holiday cheer neighbor – you know the house that doesn’t take their lights down or does the most outrageous things during the holiday? If you don’t know the house you might be that house *side eye* I don’t decorate my outside because hell I can’t decorate my insides but I do know some neighbors like to go all out during the holidays. That’s fine but don’t be tacky with it. If you are going to decorate make it nice!

Here are some tips that you can use to have a great neighborhood

  • Park in your garage …I don’t understand why people don’t park in it…….this cuts out the nosey neighbor right there
  • Don’t open your blinds….that way the borrowing neighbor won’t stop buy to borrow anything….a NO will do the trick too
  • Give your neighbor dirty looks if there are cars parked along the street and is taking up space in front of your house….just stare at them
  • Wave and keep it moving. Don’t chit chat don’t talk about your grass….just throw your hands up and speed off
  • If the neighborhood kids come knocking tell them to go look up the story about hansel and gretel I bet they won’t come back
  • The neighbor with the run down house…..nothing you can really do about this neighbor I suggest you just leave nasty notes notes on their door anonymously
  • The holiday cheer neighbor take them some cookies that spells out ‘your stuff is hideous”

If you use these tips you may find yourself being the best neighbor that you can be. Honestly though a smile and a wave is a good start. Don’t be overly nice but be cordial. I also suggest being a bit nosy…just to make sure that you know what types of cars your neighbors do drive just in case you see something suspicious. How do you deal with neighbors? What kind of neighbor are you?

Love thy neighbor as thyself

error: Are you trying to steal something? Tsk Tsk Tsk