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It's Parenting

From High school to College

August 21, 2017

It’s almost that time where parents will be dropping their kids off to college. I remember my transition….I myself was nervous. My mom…I couldn’t tell how she was she never let on if she was happy or sad. I didn’t have a dad around and the funny thing is when I first got to college…it was the first time I had seen so many fathers in the picture. My friends and I didn’t have dads in our lives so I was not use to seeing both parents in such a high rate of attendance (that sounded really professional right there lol) My mom dropped me off with my uncle. I had visited the dorm and met my roommate a month before so I knew how she looked and how our rooms looked but still I was so nervous. The day came where I was dropped off and I had second thoughts …am I in the right place, maybe I’m to far from home and should have went to a local college, do I even need college this is more work, oooohhh look at that cute boy lol. Now with technology so present it’s easy for parents to keep up with their kids and talk to them via facetime. My mom didn’t have a cell phone only a house phone so it was hard to reach her at times. I caught rides with friends from my hometown and tried to go home at least once a month…it helped that I only lived 4 hours from home and it also helped that I knew a few people where I went.

One of the girls I use to babysit is now off to college (am I telling my age?) and her mom is a ball of emotions right now. I lowkey think I will cry also when my kids leave the nest. I am going to try to keep it together but I don’t know if I will. In the meantime I had some advice for the girl I use to babysit……

Bring things from home that will make you happy. I know I love my hometown of Charleston,SC so I brought a sweetgrass basket with me. Sweetgrass baskets is a part of our history in Charleston so I knew that having it with me in my dorm room would help me transition better. Candles or anything that smells of home…bring it. It will help you out a lot

Meet people before you come to college. There is this thing that y’all have today that wasn’t big back when I was in high school…it’s called social media. Find a hashtag and start connecting with people who are going to your college. Most colleges have hashtags now and you can find out whose going to college or whose doing what based off that hashtag. You can even find some Alumni’s with that hashtag. Engage with them and ask questions and be a present force on your social media. It makes a big difference if you know people before you get there. ย You also can tell a little about their personality by what they post online. I know if I see someone coming to college who loves to shop and I don’t like to shop then maybe that’s not the person I wanna hang with but if you love to eat and the person you see loves eating out strike up a conversation

Eat healthy…..I gained what they call the freshman 15…I did. We had a buffet style type of eatery at my college and when I tell you I pigged out….I did. All the walking around on campus helped me but still I gained some weight. When I arrived to college I was 98lbs after my first few months I was 120….make sure you work out and eat healthy and drink lots of water. Have insurance because I remember getting sick and I didn’t have insurance and the Dr. at the school charged me a large amount of money for a simple cold. Think about your health before you go off to college and make sure you are aware of the best hospitals in your town and the best Doctors.

Study habits will be null and void the first few months because you are in a new place. I know I partied hard my first few months and ended up failing two classes my mom had a stern talk with me and I got myself back on track but when you go off to college and experience something new…it’s hard to stay focused. Make sure you surround yourself with focused driven people. Don’t hang with the folks that always want to party and always want to go out. Those are the people that will most likely end up failing and dropping out. Hang with those that are studying and going somewhere. That is the biggest advice I can give. I ended up flunking out of college after my sophomore year and took a year off. I took that year off to work and take some classes at a local college. After a year my mom asked me to go back for her…although I didn’t want to I decided to do it and I graduated in 2005 from Clark Atlanta University here in Atlanta, GA. I have a degree that I worked hard for and that didn’t come easy. Going to college is a huge step in your life and while you will want to go wild and have fun, remember to learn balance. You still have a life to live!

What advice would you give an upcoming college student? Whats one thing that sticks out the most about your college experience?ย 

 

  • Reply
    Alli Smith
    August 21, 2017 at 11:53 am

    I remember the days of dropping my kids off at college. I always tried to be brave in front of them and then would ugly cry all the way home. I wasn’t ready to let them go even when they were biting at the bits for a little more independence. These are all great tips for kids entering college.

  • Reply
    robin rue
    August 21, 2017 at 12:02 pm

    It goes by so fast. My oldest is going into 8th grade, so I know college is really just around the corner and will be here sooner than I know it.

  • Reply
    candy
    August 21, 2017 at 12:57 pm

    Starting college was always such a proud and sad moment for me as a parent. Whole new chapter and world for our children. More quiet and alone time for me. We all survived and they are very successful today.

  • Reply
    Paula Schuck
    August 21, 2017 at 1:13 pm

    Here’s my tip. If you apply for the campus credit card that they hard sell everywhere when you are a new student do not go wild!!! You need to pay for that stuff! It is easy to get carried away isn’t it? You think of wow independence. I spent too much money first year and had to work hard to pay off that credit card and if you can scrimp and save and have an extra job on the side use that to pay for things. Student loans can be crushing.

  • Reply
    Anosa
    August 21, 2017 at 2:27 pm

    I remember the day only to well, I knew a couple of people before I went. I connected with them online and kinda had them to meet up with best decision ever.

  • Reply
    Mimi Green
    August 21, 2017 at 2:33 pm

    I have been looking and liking the college send off pictures I’ve seen on social media. I never had the college experience. Looking back I wish my Mom would have made me go. I already know that I will be all in my feelings when it is time for my son to go. Five years and counting.

  • Reply
    Ty
    August 21, 2017 at 2:37 pm

    It is such a different time than it was when I went off to college in 1991. I will tell kids to focus on their studies because it so easy to get distracted, especially if you have parents that have kept a tight reign on you and now you are free.

  • Reply
    Jeuelle
    August 21, 2017 at 2:45 pm

    This is so timely; we have young cousins who are entering college for the first time this week and we’ve been trying to prepare them as much as possible. I will be sure to share your post with them.

  • Reply
    Christy Maurer
    August 21, 2017 at 3:31 pm

    Thankfully my kids commute. I do not think I could handle dropping them off at college! I think they’ve done better than if they’d lived on campus because of all the distractions! I know I was distracted and didn’t do as well as I could have otherwise.

  • Reply
    Jenn
    August 21, 2017 at 6:54 pm

    We have a daughter going from high school to college this year. She decided to start her classes in the winter, but there still does not seem like enough time to be fully prepared.

  • Reply
    Sarah Bailey
    August 21, 2017 at 7:14 pm

    It is such a huge step to go from school to college, a completely different environment and way of working. I wish all taking the step this year good luck!

  • Reply
    Pam Wattenbarger
    August 21, 2017 at 9:33 pm

    It is such a huge step to go to college. What independence! It is great to connect with other people who go to your college and make connections.

  • Reply
    Lisa
    August 21, 2017 at 9:43 pm

    It is a major change to go from high school to college, especially if you move away. My tip, think hard about the classes and times you sign up for. Unless you are a morning person, are you going to make that 8am class three times a week.

  • Reply
    Carissa
    August 21, 2017 at 11:57 pm

    My sister is currently in this phase of my nephew going off to school. I cried like a baby last night seeing him off! I know he will do well and have fun but I am going to miss him. He’s not far, but I believe in order for him to really experience everything we have to give him space and independence. I remember him being with my family when they dropped me off and he cried like a baby (well he was still very young) now it’s his turn! We have come full circle!

  • Reply
    Liz Mays
    August 22, 2017 at 12:21 am

    College can definitely be a shock to your system! I probably gained a few pounds in my first year too. It’s hard to do everything right even with all of the information beforehand!

  • Reply
    Claudia Krusch
    August 22, 2017 at 1:34 am

    It is such an exciting time when you are going to college for your first year. I think it is important for kids to learn how to cook and take care of their finances before they leave for school.

  • Reply
    Karissa @WithOurBest
    August 22, 2017 at 2:18 am

    I am not sure what advice I would give. Maybe don’t take yourself too seriously.

  • Reply
    Sandy N Vyjay
    August 22, 2017 at 5:57 am

    The transition from school to college is indeed a big step. One steps out from a sheltered and cloistered setup to a more free and open environment and one is vulnerable and needs to adapt quickly. The independence is also heady but must be taken with a dose of prudence.

  • Reply
    Jaime Nicole
    August 22, 2017 at 11:00 am

    What a big step. I SO agree about the freshman 15. If I could go back, I would drag my 18 year old self to the gym way more often!

  • Reply
    Tia | Pennies In My Pocket
    August 22, 2017 at 11:12 am

    I remember my trip to college as well. Fortunately for me I had family in town so I could rely on them when I was homesick. Since home was only 4 hours from school, my friends and I spent many weekends taking a drive to see the folks and get home cooked meals. I was able to miss out on the freshman 15 because I stayed active. These are great tips for any college freshman.

  • Reply
    Rose Cottrill
    August 22, 2017 at 12:59 pm

    I was older when I went to college. I had to work after high school and save up for my college money, nobody dropped me off but it was fine. Now that I am a Mom, I want to be there for my kids when they go to college.

  • Reply
    Onyi
    August 22, 2017 at 2:01 pm

    I’ve got a good amount of time b4 I have to let my babies go ๐Ÿ˜ข. Thank goodness

  • Reply
    Nesha
    August 22, 2017 at 5:45 pm

    Times are so different from when I left for college in 2005. I don’t have any children, but my nieces and nephews are my world and beyond I am always close by if they need me.

  • Reply
    Anita
    August 22, 2017 at 8:37 pm

    I don’t have kids old enough to be in college, but I can remember when I went off to college. It was a time of excitement and anxiety. My only regret was that I wish I was prepared a little more.

  • Reply
    Catvills
    August 22, 2017 at 11:01 pm

    I was 16 when I started college. I never stayed in a dorm because the university I attended was a manageable distance from home. It was the same with my kids. We lived close to a top university where they were enrolled. So there was no sending off, no care package whatsoever. Me and my husband felt like our kids never finished high school! Haha.

  • Reply
    Kiwi
    August 23, 2017 at 4:26 pm

    Look I will tell my age I was a college freshman for the first time 10+ years ago. Social media was barely out I was able to talk to my future roommate by phone for a month before I went down there but I would suggest definitely looking up the school hashtag or info on social media and check out what is in store!

  • Reply
    Katherine G
    August 23, 2017 at 5:57 pm

    My advice would be to go to college. I didn’t go until almost 10 years ago. I wish I went when I was younger and got the college experience.

  • Reply
    Jonna
    August 24, 2017 at 1:41 am

    I ended up going to a local university so I lived at home for the first few year of my college career. I still turnt up way to much and failed classes but I pulled it together before it was too late.

  • Reply
    Tiffany H.
    August 24, 2017 at 5:38 am

    I would say get involved on campus by joining various clubs to meet people and form friendships and bonds. I went from High School to being involved in everything to under grad only working and not joining social activities. I was determined to not work and join as many activities in Grad school at Howard University. Some people may have looked at me weird because I was in Grad school doing these things but it made my experience that much better.

  • Reply
    Tiffany Haywood
    August 26, 2017 at 4:42 pm

    My College experience was unique – I was a new Single Mom and working full time while attending as a full time student. It was hectic and I missed out on a lot of those ‘college’ moments while trying to just maintain. I think that’s why when my son went I lived a bit through him. I’m not a cryer and this didn’t change that but seeing him have the chance to experience what I didn’t was amazing. My advice to him was to live to the fullest and make memories that will last.

  • Reply
    Holly
    August 28, 2017 at 2:07 am

    My advice. Do what makes you happy and take your time. No rush.

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