You all know I love to read and every time I finish a book I give my highlights from the book. I finished up Don’t Settle for Safe by Sarah Jakes Roberts (T.D. Jakes daughter) and I was amazed by what I learned that I had to apply it to 2018. Make sure you get yourself a copy of the book off of Amazon.
So let’s dive into some key phrases that resonated with me throughout the book…
The gift of growing requires letting go -It’s so hard to let things go. It’s hard to forgive…it’s hard to forget the past but in order to grow you must let it go. Here is how I learned to let things go…see the good in someone. Trust that the Lord sends people to you for a season and a reason. Learn the lesson and let it go. If they did you wrong it was for you to learn a lesson. That is how I am learning to let things go these days and with me doing that I find myself growing daily in my spiritual walk and personal walk
Flaws are a necessary part of life because they foster humility – No one is without flaws. Some flaws we see on the outside and it’s clear other times we don’t see them through the seeing eye. I have a flaw that I don’t mind sharing….I don’t ever think I am good enough for anything. I am not a good enough blogger, a good enough photographer, a good enough mother. I know it’s bad but it also helps me to embrace the imperfectness of life and learn that no one is perfect
The word try leaves room for failure when it isn’t necessary – How often do we say we will try to do this or try to do that? Well, try leaves room for failure. Start replacing that try with I will do this, I will do that and then let the chips fall where they may. My son is failing science right and we were using the word try. I told him to try to pass but we are going to put a stop to that and say we are going to pass science. We will do it! Replace that try in your life and watch what happens
There will be times that you will make decisions and your eyes won’t be open until after the damage is done – Don’t you hate when you make a decision and then afterward you realize the mistake you made by your choice. Your eyes are wide open after the mistake but I think that is the best way to learn the lesson of life. Kind of like learning from your mistakes. You can have the best intentions but someone may get hurt. I always make sure I think about others before I make any huge decisions especially when it comes to my children
There is nothing wrong with not having figured out who you are, but so much can go wrong when you pretend that you have – I will admit I don’t really know who I am as of yet. I know I’m getting there but one thing I don’t do is pretend to be something I’m not. It’s okay if I’m almost 40 and I have yet to figure out life. We convince ourselves that we have it together but in reality, we really don’t.
Sometimes God allows other people to go ahead of you so that the path can be clear when you get there – We gotta stop being jealous of folks especially when they are trying to help us grow and get to a place where they are. I always surround myself with people who have been there and done that so I can know the mistakes to avoid so I can win faster. There is nothing like learning from those that walked the path before you even knew what road to turn down
Like the seasons that come and go, so are the people assigned to our lives – Some people aren’t meant to stay in your life. Tyler Perry gave a good example of this in one of his plays. Some folks are like the leaves they blow every which way, some people are the branches…they look stable but they can break you at any time. The roots though….the people who are the roots are meant to stay in your life. Don’t get upset if someone is out of your life that means they were only there for a season
The most dangerous words in a Woman’s vocabulary is I’m okay – I have said this many times and it’s not true. My real friends know when I’m not okay. I say the words sometimes hoping to believe them but most of the time it’s just me cheering myself up. We have to stop saying we are okay when we aren’t (myself included)
Many times people hurt me because I had an expectation for them that was rooted in my own desires, not their reality. Therefore my inability to forgive was because they disappointed the role I needed them to fill – We have got to learn to accept others reality as theirs and not our own. I can’t expect a man to love me who doesn’t love himself. I told a friend the other day how can you expect your spouse to love you when they can’t even love themselves. Stop expecting things from people that can’t give it to you based on what you want them to give
People who do bad things aren’t always evil; often they are broken – People don’t just wake up and become bad….what made them get that way. How were they raised? What kind of environment did they live in? Understand people and then you can understand those evil people (most) are just broken people looking for attention. Bullies are prime examples. A lot of them need attention they come from broken homes or they see their parents bullying so they become that. They aren’t evil they just see it, learn it, then become it.
It’s not what you can see that scares you; it’s what you never saw coming that can knock the wind out of you – Chile….when things hit you that you never saw coming. I got an opportunity to do photography for a huge brand. I didn’t see that coming and it knocked the wind out of me and suddenly I got scared. Now had I saw them coming I could have prepared and prepped and then I would have been trying to be overly perfect. Love is like that too….we want this perfect love match and this perfect guy but when you see that love coming at you that you didn’t expect…watch out. It will not always come in the form you expect it too either.
I hope you enjoyed some key points from the book that I loved. Make sure you go and pick you up a copy. It’s not a book that you can read in one sitting (at least I couldn’t) I had to stop and think about some of the things written. What book are you reading? I am always open to suggestion. Right now I am reading Trust by Iyanla