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4 Personal Weaknesses I want to work on for 2018

February 2, 2018

I can list my weaknesses faster than I can name my strengths. This year I want to work on 4 of them and be committed to making them my strength. In others words, I want to make my weaknesses my bish 🙂 I have let fear keep me from a lot of things so I want to share my weaknesses!

Self Love 

I don’t love me as much as I should. I have always been called ugly so I never saw myself as beautiful. To be honest I see myself as a fat ass. It’s one of the reasons I don’t show pictures of me much. Boys never saw me…they always saw the girls with the pretty hair, big ass, and all the makeup. They never wanted the plain gap teeth dark skin girl. The first time I was called beautiful by anyone was probably in 2016….yes it’s the first time someone actually called me beautiful. I have never heard the word before and I still don’t know how to take it. I am committed to learning how to love me more this year. I don’t even know where to start but I am going to try my best to look in the mirror and see something beyond what I have been called. I want to love the skin I am in all 200 something lbs of it. I think I put my self-love into what others think and not what I think. Of course, as a young girl, I have had my heart broken a time or two…hell it was broken as an adult but I have to make sure that I self-love on me. People can only love you to the extent of what they know as love. I have to love myself no matter what.

Fear

Fear sets in because I don’t love myself. I think if I can love me some of the fear will go away. What do I fear? I fear people knowing me. I know that sounds crazy but I like to be behind the scenes. I don’t like when folks come up to me and recognize me from my blog or my Instagram. (Which is why I rarely put pics up) I like to remain anonymous because I don’t like the praises. I don’t like when someone says hey are you Kita? I loved your last blog post. There are people following me now on Instagram who I don’t even know but keep up with every nook and cranny of my blog and newsletter. Perfect example, I am on the PTO board at my kid’s school and the parents will say hey all the time and I am like who are you and why do you know me lol. I don’t know why I fear praise. I also fear stepping from outside of my comfort zone. I like my comfort zone I feel no need to change it. All that yada yada yada about growth…I am growing….behind the scenes why do I have to grow in front of people.

Forgiveness

I don’t forgive. I try but once you do me some type of way…I am done with you. I will speak when spoken to but I have no desire to bury the hatchet. I don’t know why this is so hard to do. People say it’s easy but I have a hard time forgiving folks. There are some things people have done to me that I still hold on to and they are dead and gone. Like seriously why can’t I forgive these people. I try to think good thoughts when confronted with forgiving someone like maybe it’s just the way they were. I say I forgive but deep down…I am still bitter. I still remember what you did and I just can’t let it go. They say forgiveness is for you more than it is for the other person….but it’s easier said than done. I think I could forgive easier if people told the truth to why they did what they did but when people lie and you know it’s a lie….there is no closure for me and I end up being mad as hell at them forever.

Impatience

You would think after I have kids I would learn to be a bit more patience but I’m not. I need things done now…like right now. Not when you feel like it or when you get the time….I need it done asap. If I ask someone to do something and they take their time getting back to me…I move the eff on and find someone else. I am trying to find someone to tutor my son. I have called over 15 people in the past two weeks and none of them have returned my calls or bothered to get back with me. So I decided to get here and utilize google myself to teach my son his math. If I run into a problem and need help I will either pay someone on a website or find an example. I can’t wait on folks when it comes to my child’s education. I want things to happen now but I realize that things don’t work on Kita’s time…it works in God’s time. His Timing is EVERYTHING! I was going through some things a few years ago and I told some of my friends about it and they told me to wait and I’m like nope I ain’t waiting for shat I am about to do what I need to do but GOD…..I ended up waiting and lo and behold God worked it out in my favor. I am still impatient but I think this weakness will be the first to improve for 2018. I am realizing that they that wait….let me stop I’m about to preach lol

Now it’s your turn! Name a weakness below and tell me how you will overcome your weakness this year. Let’s help each other out. Give me some tips, books, podcasts, etc that I can utilize to help me out.

  • Reply
    candy
    February 2, 2018 at 2:19 pm

    You have listed things I thing everyone needs to work on at some point in their lives. Probably over and over. Good luck with changing and making yourself better.

  • Reply
    Joanna @ Everyday Made Fresh
    February 2, 2018 at 2:42 pm

    Your list sounds a lot like things that I need to work on for myself as well. Self love it hard when you see a distorted image of yourself every time you pass a reflection. Impatience, I am totally impatient with everything. It’s an annoying characteristic that I carry, that seems to get on my own nerves.

  • Reply
    Carol Cassara
    February 2, 2018 at 2:56 pm

    Those are beautiful things to work this year and you’ll come out better and with more love for yourself. I think it’s something that we should all aim for. I hope you have a lovely year ahead and that you reach all your goals for this year.

  • Reply
    Kayvona
    February 2, 2018 at 4:32 pm

    First and foremost, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! It’s so easy to get caught up in what everybody else thinks when all that matters is what God thinks. Back in 2016, I allowed someone to break me down to the core, I had never been so hurt and so betrayed and my confidence went down the toilet. I was pregnant with my second child and all I felt was shame on top of all the hurt and betrayal. I ended up taking a class at a local organization and God did some serious work on me. It was amazing, and one thing that really stood out to me was the scripture that talks about being fearfully and wonderfully made. We are God’s masterpieces, that really spoke to me like I’m a freaking masterpiece ok! Lol and so are you girl!! I too struggle with fear, fear has held me back for so long. I have the fear of failure, I’m alsway questioning my abilities so I really want to work on killing that fear and having more courage!

  • Reply
    Amber Myers
    February 2, 2018 at 9:02 pm

    I like this list. I am working on more self love as well. I need to stop feeling guilty when I do it! I am slowly getting better with impatience. I have fear too. I just signed up to be in the PTA when my daughter starts Middle School in August. Eek! I’m an introvert!

  • Reply
    Sarah Honey
    February 2, 2018 at 9:52 pm

    You are amazing! We can be so hard on ourselves. We need to practice self-love and self- acceptance.

  • Reply
    Heather
    February 2, 2018 at 10:09 pm

    I just want to touch on the forgiveness thing. I think it will help you with self-love. Would you want someone to forgive you for something you’ve done? We are all human and you know you’ve wronged people too, probably unintentionally. Just think of it that way. If you seek forgiveness from people, offer it back. Its hard I know…but that actually is apart of self-love. If you can forgive yourself, you can forgive others. I think its about letting go of what you can’t control and being happier. Okay, I’m done with my soapbox. 🙂

    • Reply
      Kita
      February 3, 2018 at 4:34 am

      Thank you! That is an awesome way to look at it!

  • Reply
    Pam Wattenbarger
    February 2, 2018 at 11:57 pm

    I think working on ourselves is such an important thing. We should always be trying to improve and grow. I need to work on procrastination.

  • Reply
    valmg @ Mom Knows It All
    February 3, 2018 at 1:13 am

    Good luck reaching your goals for the year. I hope to give myself more relaxing time this year, as a way of taking care of me.

  • Reply
    Tisha
    February 3, 2018 at 2:20 am

    It’s great that you’ve identify things that you feel are slowing down your progression! These are all very tough things to change but worth the effort. Sounds like you know specific problems and how to begin tackling them- all the best!!!

  • Reply
    rika
    February 3, 2018 at 7:51 am

    Self improvement is one of my main goals this year. Self love is very important, and I think you are a very beautiful lady. I hope you will reach your goals..

  • Reply
    Nicole's Lifestyle Lounge
    February 3, 2018 at 12:42 pm

    More love for yourself is the stimulus for everything else. It is always great to start with self.

  • Reply
    Sandy N Vyjay
    February 3, 2018 at 1:50 pm

    I think recognizing the areas that one needs to work on is the first step. You have been so honest with yourself, I am sure you will make great headway in dealing with these issues.

  • Reply
    Sarah Bailey
    February 3, 2018 at 3:13 pm

    This is such a good list, I have to admit I probably need to work on many of these as well. I am perhaps one of the most impatient people around these days.

  • Reply
    Tim B
    February 3, 2018 at 8:05 pm

    Life is all about constantly improving one’s self. Looks like you have a good perspective on that. You have yourself a nice list of resolutions for this year. Good luck with your endeavors addressing them!

  • Reply
    Sara Welch
    February 3, 2018 at 8:34 pm

    Good luck to you in you journey Kita. Making yourself a better person is never a bad idea.

  • Reply
    Mimi Green
    February 4, 2018 at 1:28 am

    I like the patience too.

    I doubt myself and I kind of wallow in it and do nothing. I allow fear to keep me from going after something that I’m capable of doing.

  • Reply
    Ricci
    February 4, 2018 at 11:33 am

    Working on ourselves is so HARD!! You get it girl!!!

  • Reply
    My Teen Guide
    February 4, 2018 at 11:54 am

    I have to work on Self-love. It seems I always put my needs in the backseat of my life. This year, I will have to learn that for me to be more loving, I have to start loving myself. Thank you for inspiring me to improve certain aspects in my life.

  • Reply
    LáDeia
    February 4, 2018 at 12:32 pm

    This was so very transparent of you. Some of these areas mentioned are areas we all should pay attention to in our own lives. I believe you are well on your way on doing your necessary work because you weren’t/aren’t afraid to confront. We can never overcome those things that we don’t confront.

  • Reply
    Anosa
    February 4, 2018 at 3:34 pm

    I think for me my biggest fear is failing at my blogging business and this year I am hoping to take the plunge to work on that. Good luck with yours Kita.

  • Reply
    Angie
    February 4, 2018 at 7:22 pm

    I think it’s really important to practice self-reflection and be able to recognize the parts of you that you want to improve. Then act on that improvement. You’re doing really well just figuring this out and working on it-great job!

  • Reply
    Elle (CleverlyChanging)
    February 5, 2018 at 12:43 pm

    I need to work on many of these attributes as well. The one I’ve been working on a lot lately is fear. I have been learning how to face my fears head on. Thanks for the transparent post, I’m sure many of us needed reminders to look inward.

  • Reply
    Kiwi
    February 5, 2018 at 12:55 pm

    I have a life problem with impatience too. So I am join you to try to have more. I am also learning to not be so sensitive and take everything so personally because people can seem so cruel but it could be their own negative projections trying to be placed upon me.

  • Reply
    Ashleigh
    February 5, 2018 at 6:11 pm

    Ooh that fear demon and impatience bug get me too, often. I work hard to try to overcome both and it’s so tough. I will same I’m proud of you for realizing what you need and want to work on and putting it out there that you’re going to make the effort to change in 2018.

    Not to promote my own post but I feel it would be helpful, (https://wp.me/p7ICvq-3v) I wrote on how I began my self-love journey a while back and hopefully it will help you on your journey to loving yourself as well. I’ve been there and know that with work and time it’s possible to change that.

  • Reply
    Lisa
    February 5, 2018 at 8:22 pm

    Awww I really loved this post , I love how you acknowledged all this and willing to work on it once that’s the first step I absolutely loved this keep it up hun

  • Reply
    Debra Hawkins
    February 5, 2018 at 8:25 pm

    These are all things I would love to work on too. I tend to hold on to grudges far too long.

  • Reply
    Shar
    February 6, 2018 at 12:09 am

    This is a really great list! I need to work on the same myself. Thanks for sharing Kita!

  • Reply
    Shar
    February 6, 2018 at 12:10 am

    This is a really great list! I need to work on the same myself. More “Me Time” Thanks for sharing Kita!

  • Reply
    Katherine G
    February 6, 2018 at 11:19 am

    My two biggest weaknesses is self love and procrastination. My having a tough time loving me has allowed people to mistreat me because I don’t see myself worthy of better treatment. I have created a weekly (For as long as I can keep it up.) post on my blog where I pick something I like about myself. My procrastination comes from fear. I want to do things but fear of failure prevents me from moving forward but I’m trying to force myself to do the things I need to do.

  • Reply
    Katherine G
    February 6, 2018 at 11:19 am

    My two biggest weaknesses is self love and procrastination. My having a tough time loving me has allowed people to mistreat me because I don’t see myself worthy of better treatment. I have created a weekly (For as long as I can keep it up.) post on my blog where I pick something I like about myself. My procrastination comes from fear. I want to do things but fear of failure prevents me from moving forward but I’m trying to force myself to do the things I need to do. I am tired of being stagnant.

  • Reply
    Katherine G
    February 6, 2018 at 11:20 am

    My two biggest weaknesses is self love and procrastination. My having a tough time loving me has allowed people to mistreat me because I don’t see myself worthy of better treatment. I have created a weekly (For as long as I can keep it up.) post on my blog where I pick something I like about myself. My procrastination comes from fear. I want to do things but fear of failure prevents me from moving forward but I’m trying to force myself to do the things I need to do. I am tired of being stagnant. It gets old.

  • Reply
    EG III
    February 6, 2018 at 12:34 pm

    Excellent list. I must say that fear is probably something we all struggle with and it takes breaking out of your shell and having confidence in the ability that you know you possess. One of the books I started the year with was Unf*ck yourself and I found it to be full of little gems.

  • Reply
    Nikki
    February 7, 2018 at 1:59 am

    My word for the year is “heal” and I have a lot of work to do to accomplish my goal. I struggle with loving myself, seeing my value, and being confident. A lot of it I believe stems from not knowing whom we belong to. As one commenter mentioned-we are fearfully and wonderfully made. Once we internalize that idea, we are unstoppable.

  • Reply
    gina
    February 9, 2018 at 8:00 pm

    YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. know this and et no one take that from you.

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